5/1/19

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5/1/19 Ad
MAY DAY 2019
Publication Date May 1, 2019
Ad Source The Arizona Daily Wildcat
Page Number 13
Smiley Type Smiley with 5 hairs

Ad Transcript

SR/CL: May Day 2019) Leitmotiv: "Dare to hope"

-Luther

Gustavus Adolphus has reserved Hus Hall at the Hotel California in honor of the 489th Anniversary of the Confessio Augustana. An additional vat of Full Doctrine will be on tap to celebrate the exposure of the Pelagian devils as perverts and sodomites. Calvin will present the latest assay tallies from the Feather River placers, while Cromwell will deliver a load of Pigs harvested from Grandpa's Farm. The Loyal Order of UN-reconstructed Freaks will transmit the itinerary for The Summer Tour as per the optimal path of the 5/1/72 map--directly through the Slough of Despond, culminating in Novus Ordo Seclorum. The Orphanage directly commends Latimer & Ridley for bringing us one step closer to "Reform without enforcement is Camelot without Merlin." "Et ad haec quis tam idoneus?" Orate pro nobis.

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Double black border with symbols inscribed on each side.

Top: 24 star symbols (★)

Left: 35 exclamation points (!)

Right: 26 pound signs (#)

Bottom: 29 semicolons (;)

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Leitmotiv

"Dare to hope" - Luther

"Dare to hope" is a fairly common phrase in religious texts. The mostly likely reference, however, is to Martin Luther's 1522 book Martinus Lutherus contra Henricum Regem Angliæ, or Against Henry, King of the English. Luther wrote the book in response to Henry XIII's 1521 book Assertio Septem Sacramentorum, or Defence of the Seven Sacraments (Full text) which was a polemic against Protestantism and Martin Luther's teachings.

And so that fugitive and fool-headed Luther has dared to jump into the circle of the teeth of Behemoth! And what have the terrible giants been doing? For the past three years there has not been found one of them who would come to us to Wittenberg and stand up against us although assured of our good faith and protection (for we were going to do all things under the presidency of their Caesar). And yet this effeminate and cowardly crew dare to hope for a triumph, and a covering up of their shameful cowardice, by my flight into Bohemia, to which they give world-wide celebrity, while they themselves because of their mental unpreparedness and timidity do not dare to come out into the open against Luther by his lone half.

- Full text

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